Monday, May 12, 2008

Bad Beat Post

OK, I'm really starting to wonder if this is me, or if it's just variance, or the cards, or what. All I know is that I have been playing what seems to be my optimal game, but I haven't been able to notch a single win.

All. Month. Long.

Here's a typical example.

We're three handed and I'm way ahead after spiking Queen Frostine two turns back. I got stuck in the licorice but I just tighten up and play my game and I'm still well in the lead when I find:

BOOOOOOOOOM! This puts me one from the rainbow and almost all the jump cards are burned. I'm a 98% favorite at this point. My opponents each draw singles and one of them isn't even to Grandma Nut yet.

I flip my card.

Gingerbread! Are you KIDDING me? Are you SERIOUS? The one card in the deck that loses and it hits me. Of course. Of COURSE. Could I have played that any differently? Honestly, I'm asking you. Help me out. You tell me what I'm doing wrong. I've been doing hand analysis. I've read the experts. Seriously, I'm lost at this point.

I'm steaming, but I try not to show it. I'm a professional.

My four-year-old looks over her mirrored shades at me.

"Bad beat, dad."

Candyland is rigged.


OhCaptain said...

Candyland is so rigged. I've since moved the girls to Sorry. I've got an edge there.

With a few more decisions needing to be made, I can use my Daddy powers to convince a certain 4 year old that by going after Mommy's pieces, it will only make her play better.

Although I'm not sure I'm winning when Mommy is done using her Mommy powers even if all my pieces are first to the base.

(The Mrs got a bit ticked at me. I was playing Go Fish with the oldest girl online against someone out in the ether (who knew you could play online Go Fish?). Seems I was looking for optimal stategy to win at a higher rate then just the cards would dictate (3rd level thinking). Apparently, thats a bit too advanced for the kids.)

Short-Stacked Shamus said...

Word is WSOP officials initially proposed adding both Candyland and Uno to Event No. 8 (the "World Championship Mixed Game" event), but the Players Committee nixed the move for unspecified reasons. You may well have hit on one possible reason for the exclusion.

Instant Tragedy said...

Gingerbread Man is the rake.

And Shamus, the reason why Candy Land etc was removed from Event # 8 is the Chuck Norris Rule, when he won a NL hand using a Get out of Jail Free Card, Wild Card Draw Four from Uno, the Joker, the 2 of clubs and the seven of spades.

He called it the Hammer Slam.

And Everyone folded.

Cause the Hammer Slam is the Nuts!

KajaPoker said...

KajaKid is only 3 so when we play CandyLand I actually have to rig the card pile in her favor anyway. So rigged.

The real tilt inducer is Chutes & Ladders though. That game is just brutal.

And no matter how I spread out the cards in Gowns & Crowns, my Belle always ends up naked.

PokahDave said...


Drizztdj said...

My son uttered a "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!" when he got Grandma Nut.

I'm buying him a PH hat tomorrow complete with shades and phrase book.