Friday, February 8, 2008
LOST 009: Four Freighties And A Funeral
L O S T
Holy crap, they're giving us answers? Right away? Pardon me while I sit down, I've got the vapors.
New Questions, Fresh Off The Chopper
* Why was Dan so upset? That is, since he didn't know why he was so upset, what was making him upset? My guess? He's an empath.
* Dan said, "The light just doesn't scatter quite right here." What on earth did that mean?
A) Computer simulation?
B) Different planet?
C) Different epoch in time?
D) They're in an underwater bubble?
E) Dan's on drugs?
Whatever it meant, it wasn't a throwaway line, and it was definitely one of the big clues of the night.
* Why aren't the people on the island and everybody around him not a LOT more skeeved out that Dan is played by Jeremy Davies, whose every single character have either been a) creepily ineffectual; b) ineffectually creepy; c) creepy; or d) had sex with his mothe-AW MAAAN I DON'T WANT TO WATCH THIS.
* Why would a news channel show footage inside Fauxceanic 815 and then, having done that, just linger and linger and linger and linger and linger and linger and linger and linger and linger on the finger the finger the finger the finger of the pilot? I don't think this is a clue or anything, I just thought it was dumb.
* There was a Dharma hydra patch and a polar bear fossil out in the desert. Why? Hmm, let me return to that.
* Miles can hear ghosts. What is the island going to be like for Miles? Honey bunches of ghosts. I'm hoping they develop this further.
* Right now I really want a breakdown of the various organizations. There's at least two, because there is Dharma, and then there is Mittelos (anagram for Lost Time), who was funding Ben after he, um, killed everybody in Dharma. This organization that's come to get him could be Mittelos, or Dharma, or some other group.
New Information, and a Whole Lot of It
* Locke doesn't know what the smokemonster is.
* Ben doesn't either, or he REALLY doesn't want to tell what the smokemonster is. Also, he can take a punch to the face like nobody else. He's going to want to take an Asprin is all I'm saying.
* Apparently in the world of Lost, Walt being taller is actually going to be a plot point instead of just being played off. They still haven't explained how 3 month old Turniphead is 30 lbs.
* Locke's still shot. OUCH.
* There was sure enough a faked Oceanic crash. There are two planes. One of them is intact (which . . . why would nobody call bullshit there? Even if a plane hit the water, would it stay in one piece? The pilot would stay in his seat? I need a ruling on that one.)
* Naomi was the only member of the new team worth anything in a crisis. Ooops. Also, she ain't got a sister.
* There is an organization and Abbadan is a bigwig amongst them. He has a very large, very empty office. They know a lot about the island, the crash survivers, and they know there are other people on the island.
* When Abbadan said, "Are they still alive?" he may well not have been referring to the Losties. He may be talking about his team, and Ben.
* The team came to get Ben. Theories as to why? How about the time he totally killed the entire Dharma initiative? That's my current operational theory. Either that, or it's the purple sky event, and whatever that meant. One thing for sure, they didn't come for him because he has a man on their boat. That's a lie, or at least a half truth. He may well have a plant on the boat, but that's not why they came to get him. Think about it.
"We're going on a mission to get Ben."
"Because he has a man on our boat."
"The boat we're sending . . . um, on the mission."
"The mission to get Ben?"
"So the mission is to get Ben. Because he will have a man on the boat we're sending to get him because he'll have a man on the boat that we send?"
"I'm going to go watch Heroes."
* It now seems more clear why there are only six rescue-ees. Not enough gas, they can't spare the weight of a body. But if so, why take Hurley? He weighs seven Naomis.
Theories and Random Clutter
* Wow, it's a brand new day for Lost, isn't it? If this was Season 2, they'd have spent an entire episode introducing each member of the team, maybe two episodes for Dan, then another two getting to the helicopter,(along with an filler episode in there about Sawyer and . . . oh let's say Jin, looking for his lucky coin), and then maybe another one revealing that Abbadan was a part of it, and then we'd get the episode where they revealed they wanted Ben. All in one hour this time, kids.
* Jack's a Moron moment: Giving Miles the phone, and then just letting him stroll away. WHAT????
* Locke's a Moron moment: "Besides his mouth, he's completely harmless." WHAT???? At least Sawyer called him on that one.
* Locke: "I'm operating under Walt's orders. He's taller now." Sawyer's Face: "Damn. Why do I always choose the crazy team?"
* My guess for who the next revealed member of Oceanic Six (which would make a great name for a jazz/soul ensemble) is . . . Michael. Hopefully he has a line beyond "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLT!!"
* Miles is probably the most awesome new character since Ben. He and Sawyer and Ben can have a sarcasm-off.
* "Well, what does taller Walt's ghost say?" Line of the night.
* Hey, remember all those Others than Ben was traveling with before he went to get "captured" by Jack? Let's not forget them. The show is trying to make us think that Ben's the last Other or something. There was a whole tribe of them that didn't get killed at the beach. All the kids, and Teresa the stewardess, and Richard Never-age, and a bunch more. Where they at?
* You know what's AWESOME? For anybody landing on the island now, Locke and his group would pretty much seem exactly like the Others seemed to the Losties in Season 1. The Oceanics are becoming the Others. Cooooooool.
* OK, the archeological dig. The hydra patch. The polar bear fossil. This was the big reveal of the night, I've got no doubt. Remember, I've been saying all along that the question is not "where are they", but "when are they". Remember, the trip to the island is a boppitty-bumpitty ride. You need to be sedated, even. I think Charlotte found the island in that dig. If we have time travel or a temporal nexus, we can have people seeing people after their deaths. We can have people who don't age. I'm just saying consider it. No only that, but the lady who found the Dharma patch there? Her name is Charlotte Staples Lewis. Weird middle name, right? That's a direct shout out to Clive Staples Lewis, C.S. Lewis for short, the Christian apologist most famous for writing The Chronicles of Narnia. Both that series and his Space Trilogy have books featuring what? People from our reality spirited away to another dimension/planet, and an Edenic garden paradise that has been infiltrated by a horrible evil presence . . .
My "Time Travel / Garden of Eden Theory" is still in effect until further notice.
Join us next time, when we hear Claire say:
"But it's my only line!"
L O S T