Sunday, February 10, 2008

Donkey Is A Goat: Live Blogging FTOPS Event 8

Alright, in case you hadn't heard, I won my way into FTOPS #8 via a writing contest hosted by Michael Craig. I figure if writing got me here, why pay attention to my game? I'll just sit and write, occasionally checking my hole cards and always twirling, twirling, twirling toward victory.

But back to the contest. Michael Craig, the blogger-in-residence over at Full Tilt, as well as the author of this universally loved poker book, not to mention the editor on this excellent strategy guide, offered up one (later changed to two) seats into the FTOPS Event #1 to whosoever emailed him with the best reason that they should be the recipient. The very event I was planning on playing! For free? How about yeah. I sent him something dull, then forgot about it. Then he foolishly let it slip that multiple entries would be allowed, and I stuffed the ballot box with my silly jokes.

Michael went with American Idol and boobs for his winning entries. (This leads me to a follow up question: If you have boobs, why aren't you winning more contests? Remember this: boobs=contest wins, as well they should.) Anyway, Mr. Craig made his picks, and fine picks they were. But then he went the extra mile and hooked up . . . me, with a prize that he made up for the sole purpose of hooking me up for my scribbling, or maybe just to stop the constant influx my marginally funny brain scrapings. He didn't have to, but he did, and I'm quite grateful. That pretty much makes Michael Craig my guardo camino, which is Greek slang for "main home-skillet." And thus kicks off the first of three weeks in what remains of Michael Craig month.

You had me at "free money", Michael Craig. You had me at "free money."


Live Blogging It:

9:47: About four hours before the opening bell, which is coincidentally how much sleep I've had in the past 48 hours. I think my baby is teething.

11:00: Other bloggers in this event include: BoneDaddy and cracknaces. Anybody else? Let me know if you're reading this and know of others.

1:47: Over 5300 runners. It's entirely possible this thing will fill up. Madness. I guess I should take a moment here to go over my game plan for this thing. I intend to try something that has worked well for me in the past. I'm going to basically try very early to get lucky, then I'll try to get lucky in the middle levels, as we approach the bubble I'm going to shift gears and try to get really really lucky, and then once in the money I intend to sit back and get quite lucky indeed. Let's see how that goes for me.

1:57: Aaaaand we're full. SIX THOUSAND RUNNERS people. SIX THOUSAND RUNNERS. Um, I think Tilt managed to make their guarantee.

2:00:Shuffle up and deal. Let me introduce you to my starting table:

pukewang: Believes that the world will end in fire. Also, he has a pukewang. Don't ask to see it.

Ness35: Believes that the world will end in ice.

Nide: Believes that world will end somewhere in Newark.

butch4343: Believes that inside of his cranium are small deposits of a heretofore undiscovered element, which, when properly reduced to liquid form, will allow us to explore outer space together in peace and harmony, and also provide us with unlimited supplies of beef jerky.

madmax79: Believes in fairies, but still wouldn't clap for Tinker Bell. Peter Pan has vowed to pop a cap in him. Long story.

Julius_Goat: Doesn't believe any of this. By the way, this thing is paying out like 5%, probably because of the size of the field. On top of that it's prime Euro time, KO and 6 Max. This could be the biggest minefield EVER.

2:24: And . . . I'm out. I caught Aces and Ness35 caught a Jack on the river, beating me with his Jacks. Somehow I only lost 1,o00 chips there. The very next hand I raised with AQ and butch and madmax called. Flop was 2KQ and I made it a little more than half pot. Both of them called. and the pot was around 900. The turn was an Ace, giving me Aces up. I made it 700 and butch smooth called, while madmax pushed all in. I decided I couldn't find a fold given the structure and holding a strong hand, and considering how much I'd already put in, so I called. Butch folded with 400 chips left! Thanks for sweetening the pot, Butch! madmax had JT for the nuts and I didn't boat up. GG me.

Honestly, this is the second best case scenario. Playing 6 hours to make the bubble or the small money would be pretty rough. However, the first case scenario is much much MUCH better than the second case scenario. I'm very disappointed.

Go get those scalps, Michael, and thanks for the opportunity. Thanks to those who railed, however briefly. Sorry this was such a fizzle.

6:20: Looks like we're down to about 400 now. I know you're all really, extremely proud of me for what I was able to accomplish in those 10 hands I played, but for me what it comes down to is: 5,750th place is just 5,749th loser.

Also, in 10 hands, 250 players went out. This thing was the poker version of the Normandy scene in Saving Private Ryan. I think I played the part of "Infantryman in the Water #83."



OhCaptain said...

Would you like a loud, raucus rail today, or should we just keep you in our thoughts...quietly enjoying the action with subdued golf claps and quiet whispers?

Congrats by the way! A freeroll well earned.

Julius_Goat said...

Any rail is more than welcome, Cap.

jjok said...

gl bud

Mondogarage said...

And by "any rail", the Goat is, of course, referring to rail drinks, because he's cheap like that.

So for you, I order three rail rum and cokes, and a constant stream of pocket rockets. GL

Mike Maloney said...

Good luck Goat!

$mokkee said...

GL Goat !

OhCaptain said...

I love to schedule luck. Makes it less of a surprise when it happens. I don't like surprises much, they make me uncomfortable.

Yep, looks like this thing will fill up. There it goes! Its full!

OhCaptain said...

Sorry Goat! Like I've said though, AQ is the hand of the devil. Someday, people will believe me :-)

You'll get'em next time!

bayne_s said...

sorry Goat,

I am playing event as well

Anonymous said...

Boobs do come in hand at times.


Julius_Goat said...


Was that a typo?

I agree with your typo.

tedforrestfan said...

I guess that goes into the Freudian slip category. My husband says "Mmmm, yes they do..."